You probably left out the fact that you are addicted to hardcore p*rn and you can only be turned on by this — just a guess, but probably a good one.
First of all, ditch the hardcore, you’ll get over it.
Secondly, if your wife isn’t in good shape, get her in good shape.
Thirdly, learn how to do her right — who knows maybe you are probably something of a pathetic lover, and I would say if you were doing her right, you’d be quite addicted to sex. You see, a woman’s vagina will release natural pheromones when she is aroused, and these will turn you on big time. Also the sheer warmth and wetness, intimacy (know what that is?), etc, will put the hand to shame, no contest. Well I hope you use a lubicant to guard against injury.
While masterbating, we can dream…fantasize…since most of our physical fulfillment is triggered from our brain.
Having been married a while myself, fantasizing becomes difficult when our partner isn’t open to fulfilling fantasies with us, after becoming so familiar with one another nothing is new or exciting, or when we’ve been denied fulfillment and after a while feel it work to suggest fulfillment, or feel obligation to fulfill our partner. Perhaps you can help guide your partner to masterbate you and likewise do the same for your partner. Sex should be fun! Good Luck!!
My first thought was also ‘why?’. Is it because masturbation takes away the ‘need to perform’ angle, or because intercourse does not supply the friction you need?
The question is WHY do you PREFER to masturbate rather than have sex with your wife? I would suggest that you seek the advice and counsel of a sex therapist on this compulsive masturbation addiction matter. There can be a variety of reasons for your preference. The important thing in my mind is to work through WHY.