What Affects A Floundering Relationship

How Confident Attitude Affects Your Relationship

As with everything else we do in life, attitude is crucial. How we think about what awaits us, particularly in the near future, strongly influences our lives.

Hope spurs us on, hopelessness, the inability to foresee, satis­faction in the future, creates despair.

Many of us are, in fact, despondent; we view our relationships as floundering and act accordingly, that is to say, with weakened commitment put little in because we expect little in return. And this is just what we get, a meager return.

Hope vs. Hopelessness Advice

In sharp contrast, the hopeful person expecting that an event will turn out well, signals his enthusiasm through facial stature, and confident attitude.

Those who are involved with this person are encouraged by his display of self-assurance, are drawn in by his enthusiasm, and are likely to respond in kind. The law of expectations is simple: The way an event is viewed (how you expect it to turn out) will affect your behavior and, in turn, alter the actual outcome.

Power Of Expectation Study

The power of expectation was very evident among supervisors of sailors in the U.S. Navy who were low performers (LPs). Supervisors were given a simple tactic to change the LPs behavior: expect the best of them, despite their checkered histories. The supervisors took the advice and treated the sailors like winners. The power of expectation proved powerful. The LPs began to do better on every front.

In a similar vein, athletic coaches and good managers alike have long known that one strategy to boost performance is the combination of a suitable challenge and communicating a belief in the person to perform admirably.

Positive imagery, a method for visualizing success in the mind’s eye, has long been used in athletics. As the saying goes, imagining yourself succeeding doesn’t guarantee a win, but viewing yourself losing almost always guarantees that you’ll get what you see.

Apply this method to your relationship

The main theme of this study (and of others cover­ing such diverse topics as stuttering, psychological testing and physical disability) is that expectations are major deter­minants of human behavior; expectations are both interper­sonally communicated and influential of others’ behavior.

With this material as background, it becomes apparent that negative expectations (“He doesn’t care about me and he never will”) can become self-fulfilling prophecies.