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    Posted by Kinda upset:
    I've been seeing this girl for a few days now, and we have shared intimate love making occasions. I can get her off fine, thats not the problem, but she cant get me off when we are making love, i mean im hard and everything. she tries for a conclusive load release a while and get sooo tired and cries....I feel awful. I have been pleasuring myself to a load discharge 2+ times a day for many years does that affect it? help!!!! i cant stand to see her cry anymore


    Follow Ups:
  • Re: my new partner is upset with me clint902
    Remember that no vagina will be as tight as your own grip. If you stop pleasuring yourself you will have a conclusive load release with your woman....It will happen! Also remember to just relax and enjoy yourselves and not worry about the final "explosion". You want to take the stress off yourselves

  • Re: my new partner is upset with me Bindii(2)
    Hey, don't be too upset this can be fixed. Think about what your girlfriend does to you, does it feel good?....is the pressure and the tempo right? - obviously not. The best thing you can do for your girlfriend is to tell her or show her what you need to reach orgasm. Just explain to her what you would like her to do, for instance if she is sexually stimulating your private part you can say "I like that", "don't stop" or "faster...harder..softer etc". Or you can put your hand on top of hers and show her how you like it - even better sexual stimulating in front of her so she can observe what you like.

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    Communication is one of the most important things for a healthy sex life. Your girlfriend is feeling bad, she thinks that she is not good in bed, she thinks that she doesn't turn you on...it hurts.

    Another thing to remember that because you have been pleasuring yourself 2 times a day for so long is that your bosy has become used to certain pressures and tempo's. Its hard to retrain yourself to react to different stimuli...... often a not so perfect stimulation because obviously we know what we need and when we pleasuring ourself we are able to provide the 'perfect' stimulation to bring ourselves to orgasm. You will need to 'retrain' your body to react to this different stimulation. I'd suggest though to make things a little easier for the first few times that you try not to self-stimulate for a few days (longer if you can) before you attempt sexual contact with your girlfriend next...this will help you discharge your load faster as your bodly function activity will be seeking the final shooting release it hasn't had for a while.

    Its also really important that you enjoy the experience...in other words relax when she is trying to stimulate you. Open your mind, fantasize. Relax and enjoy the sensual sensations activity. If you have too much pressure on yourself to orgasm then you will have more problems reaching your goal.

  • Reply by: V
    It sounds like the problem might be a mental issue. Try this: with you your clothes on, touch each other and communicate romanticly with each other.

    Once you're doing that for a while and you're comfortable with that, you'll move to the romantic second stage, where they'll be caressing and touching and intimate communication without clothes. The third stage when you have it up is to have make love and to orgasm. The important thing is for you not to focus on the end result but, to focus on what you are doing at the moment, pleasing your partner with an orgasm.

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    Poste by: MSH
    If you are able to orgasm in during self stimulation then your reproductive organs are working ok to orgasm for seminal release. It could be a Performance anxiety disorder problem. For many the orgasms abilities issue is psychological. Performance anxiety can be a serious obstacle to a fulfilling romantic relationship, but it can also be overcome. Stress can be causing the problem, many differant factors can come into play. You need to be checked for low testosterone levels that can be done with no doctor's office visit.

    See a certified sex psychologist or psychiatrist, or a psychologist or psychiatrist who has had experience in this particular area, to make sure that they're well-referred and that they're people who are qualified.

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