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Posted by JimC:
I am impotent due to
retarded (delayed) ejaculation. I am unable to achieve orgasm with my wife vaginally,
orally or manually although I can masturbate to orgasm very easily when alone.
One sex therapist we tried suggested
Sensate Focus Therapy which did not work because
you need to be able to mastubate to orgasm with your wife in the room, which I am unable to do.
Does anyone know of any other kind of therapy to cure this problem?
Thank you.
Retarded (Delayed) Ejaculation Follow Ups:
Posted by Dave:
I am also unable to ejaculate during sex with my partner,we have a very good sex life, are very open with each other so i don,t believe i,m/was stressed, i can stay erect for hours but still can not cum. I only cum occassionally when i masterbate maybe 2 or 3 times out of 10 Now i,m getting really frustrated and so is my partner she is begining to feel like she is not satisfing me. can someone please help me cure this problem.
Stop with the masturbation and abstain from any sexual activity for awhile. The more you miss it the more you want it. If that doesn't work, get professional help. Before spending money on Sex Therapy for Delayed Ejaculation make sure the therapist has a PROVEN RECORD OF SUCCESS in treating this difficult and humiliating male sexual dysfunction.
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Posted by Joshua:
I had a girlfriend about a year ago that was overweight and I generally couldn't ejaculate (90% of the time) when we had sex. I think that it was psychological because I now have have no problem, when my new girlfriend and I are having sexual intercourse.
Also there is more trust in my relationship now and that we try many different positions to add to our intimacy. It's only sometimes when I am very tired that I can't maintain erection for long enough to ejaculate. Normally I ejaculate within 15 minutes, but when I'm tired, I just don't have the energy to build to the climax, so we just stop then.
Posted by: Tudor
I had the same problem with anorgasmia retarted ejaculation. When masturbating, I could achieve orgasm easily,
but through sexual intercourse, it didn't work, even if my girlfriend tried to help me every time. Only a few days ago,
after almost one year of trying, I achieved orgasm in her vagina.
For me, the solution was a week of abstinence (no masturbation at all) and a lot of sport during this week.
I advise all of you to make a lot of outdoor sports (for example, I was hiking). After a whole week of outdoor sport and
abstinence, I assure you, that you will be a new man!
Posted by: Will
I just lost another GF to this problem. I can masturbate in front of her and with her help sometimes.
I have not gotten a chance to try to quit the porn. Since she is gone, I really wanna show her I dont need that stuff.
I guess if your partner is not willing to help, then you gotta find one that will.
I wish a hypnotist would help. I would give anything to be normal.
Reply by: Will
So this "cure" has nothing to do with my hopefully new partner or ex partner? I thought talking about it and working
on things would have been the call. I am trying to stop the porn, but now that I am single, whats the point.
With my ex I have always felt like it was right there. The thought of urine coming out kinda drew it back in.
Due to being embarrassed. But the porn is hard to kick being single.
Reply by: jim
Sometimes a hypnotist can help.
A hypnotist trained in sexual health therapy might be beneficial support for you.
Reply by: Eric
I also have tis problem. I went to wikipedia.org and looked it up. What I found (which I never thought about) is that
when men masturbate we apply more pressure on the penis, pressure not applied during vaginal intercourse
(so try not doing it so hard or less often). Also, if your partner asks you if you finished or
if your about to finish it puts more pressure on you to actually finish and you lose sight of the enjoyment of sex and
you cant finish. Basically tell your partner and work through it together.
Posted by: CJ
I also have this disorder to a certain extent. My girlfriend is very pleased as I can sometimes go for hours
before climax. If, even after hours, I don't cum I simply play it off as if it's ok and that all I want is for her to feel
good and that makes me feel good, but in reality it has started to become a problem and I think she notices it too.
I have noticed though that when I am regularly exercising or doing some physically demanding work, and not cheating with
the porn girls, I can often achieve orgasm quite quickly. One thing I also noted from researching the issue is that when
guys masturbate, they often use an atypical movement, such as fast-slow-fast-slow or whatever. This atypical movement along
with the extra pressure, can train your body to only respond to those motions. In short I think; quit the porn, abstain
from masturbating, if you masturbate do it softer with more natural movements even if you don't cum at first, and get lots
of exercise, this should dramatically improve your ability to perform with your girlfriend.
Posted by: Will
I am kinda glad I am not the only one with this. I agree with being happy making my gf at the time cum, but yes
even she after time wanted a normal sexual session with me. I guess she thought I didnt enjoy it cause I didnt finish,
which was not true. So it turned her off. And now I am single again. And watching the porn even more. I thought true love
conquered all. I guess not. She said she was tweaked by it and hoped it would happen when I got comfy with her.
The info here has helped me, but with no gf in my life I cant try things. If I ever get back with her I know I will be the
man she wants.I would give anything to be normal in the bed. But if she or any woman doesnt care to work on it,
then I guess they arent the one.
Posted by J. Adams:
I have been diagnosed with anxiety depression. I feel it is more anxiety than depression. Ive had this problem in
varying levels for about 17 years. I used to take Zoloft for a year or so fairly regularly. I also take alprozalam which
is suppossed to be generic for Xanax. I had delayed ejaculation symptoms with the Zoloft ,but could achieve climax after
two or three tries. I could also masturbate and climax if all else failed, but it did take longer. About a month ago my
anxiety really came back hard and my Dr. put me on Lexapro 10mg for 10 days then 20 mgs per day. I have been unable to
climax for three weeks now. I can't even masturbate to climax. Today I took a 100mg Viagra so I could keep it hard long
enough to hopefully climax but no results. It's as if Iv'e lost sensation. This is making my anxiety worse. Atleast sex
would relax me for a while, now I've lost that. If you get Lexapro prescribed, watch for simular symtoms. As for me I'd
rather have anxiety and sex than peace of mind and no PIECE.
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