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Posted by: JaneWe were abstinate until marriage, and I worry that this may have put too much pressure on us early in the marriage. Once we were married and it was "okay" to have sex, my husband and I didn't know what to do. We didn't even consummate the marriage until two weeks after our wedding. Since then things haven't gotten much better. We have been married nearly five years, and he has never had an orgasm and no climax with me when making love . . . ever.
I am so attracted to him, but I feel like I have to beg him to have sex with me. I have no concerns that he is being unfaithful, but I dont think he understands how much it hurts me that he has shut me out of this vital part of our marriage.
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Over the past five years we have managed to have sex ~ once a month, and every time its just because it's in his words "the right thing to do" like an unpleasant obligation akin to doing the taxes, or polishing the silver.
I have accepted that we might never have children because he can't have an orgasm. I have urged him to seek treatment and even brought him to a marriage therapist, but he downplayed the problem, and we weren't really able to get any help from the therapist.
I am at my witts end. I don't want to leave him, but I don't want to go the rest of my life without knowing what it is like to be really desired and pursued. I wan't to know what it's like to really be with my husband. I want us to eventualy be able to have children together - without having to involve test tubes or turkey basters. If anyone has any suggestions that could help I would really appreciate it.
Reply by: charly
Well, if he can orgasm during masturbation then his love making physical reproductive system is working ok.
It might be a good idea to have his testosterone level checked out by a urologist
doctor. Low levels means it will affect his Libdo (sexual desire). Testosterone gel is a treatment for that.
He seems like he may be a very shy and sensitive person in bed. Maybe he is sensitive to his penis size or he is afraid how well he will be able to sexually perform when making love. The inability to reach orgasms It could be any number of things. It's best you find out by asking sensitive questions for a better and more meaningful relationship. You have to put it in a way that will not offend his sensitivity. Maybe he is masturbating too much.
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It's best for you to get a love making specialist (not a marriage specialist). Find a sexual therapist near you for professional help. They have many more things to help you and that would be beneficial for making love.
Not Interested for Orgasms - Posted by: Missy -
My husband not interested and will not touch me.
His testosterone levels are normal. He can get a penile hard on and he says he is not cheating.
He says he is just tired but finds energy to do all his hobbies...
Lack of sex for orgasms - Posted by: desperate wife -
Lack of sex in marriage, libido, & stress problems
My husband and I have had not the greatest sex life our whole 13 years. He does not want or desire sexual intercourse but maybe every couple of months. But it has now been 7 months and he still does not desire for sex. He has never masterbated and he is not going after anyone else...
Post No Orgasms comment
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