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Posted by: swampyI tried talking about it and asked if was me that she had a problem with, she said it wasn't but over the next two years things slowly tappered off more and more. I've continued to ask from time to time how she feels about it all and I don't really get much of an answer. She says she is not unhapppy, doesn't want anyone else but just doesn't have the interest anymore for making love. It has now been six years since we have actually made love. She says it is more than likely that it is menopause that is causing it. I guess I've pretty much given up on asking anymore as it seems to get her upset. Other than that we are actually really happy together, we always were good friends.
The thing is that now I am starting to think about other women which is something I hadn't done up till now. I haven't been with another woman since we were married and just thinking about it makes me feel as guilty as hell, almost as if I actually had done so. I guess I just can't see any way out of this, I can't and won't force her by way of blackmail or anything like that. I guess I'm just tired of feeling like this. Six years is a long time to wait. I don't want to be unfaithful but I don't want the rest of my life to be like this either.
STRESS (mental, physical, emotional) is one big killer of libido, be it guys or female. I would highly recomend that BOTH of you seek the advice and counsel of a marriage counselor. I REALLY DO. The counselor will not solve your problems, but will help to guide you to a solution. No one session is not adequate, it will take a number of sessions over a period of 2-3 months. By the way, a number of health policies do cover marriage counseling. If your wife will not go with you to a marraige counselor, then I suggest that you seek the advice and counsel of a counselor by yourself. You will need to determine what is best for you and the rest of your life.
I cannot imagine not having any lovin' for a few months, let alone six years. I can understand your feelings and temptation to be "unfaithful". Please, at this time don't. Wait until your wife has had her testosterone level checked, and you have gone through counseling. If in the end there is no change, then you will have to make a decision regarding your marriage. If you do decide on a divorce, then wait until it is final BEFORE you seek out another woman. Life can become VERY nasty when cheating is involved.
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I have blamed myself so many times over it in the past but do not hold any grudge. It was as they say only just one of those things. Howevr it seems to have been the trigger for what has happened since. I think that is one of the reasons she doesn't want to talk to others about this problem as she did get very hurt at the time.
I really don't want to rake over those coals again, not because it in any way upsets me but because it seems to upset her. Every so often she will say sorry for what happened and I assure her it's ok, but then it goes back to the status quo. I guess I just want to remember what it is like to hold someone again. Her and my son are the most important things in my life, always have been, and as far as I can see always will be.
I definately believe she feels the same but that wall just doesn't seem to go away. As two people go we couldn't be closer, as lovers we couldn't be further apart. I don't want to do anything that will break that bond, but I feel I don't want to wait any more. Maybe it's best to let sleeping dogs lie. Thank you for your reply , it's been a help just to be able to say this to someone else. I wish ther was some kind of female viagra that would help.
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Well, I ordered some penis enhancement patches, pills and went thru the enlargement exercises program and
it went very well. She says my bigger penis size is now better for her. Why don't you give it a try! Jim & Mary